Domestic abuse and suicide – a mother’s call for change

The SETDAB conference in November 2024, focused on exploring the links between Domestic Abuse and suicide.  At the conference Phyllis Daly shared the tragic story of her daughter, Jessie Laverick, who died aged 34 after enduring domestic abuse.

Phyllis Daly’s heart breaking story

Jessie Laverack was found dead at home in Yorkshire in 2018. After a five-day inquest, the coroner concluded that the underlying cause of Jessie’s mental illness was domestic abuse and that a lack of a co-ordinated approach by care professionals contributed to her decline.

Missed opportunities and campaigning for change

Almost seven years on from her daughter’s death, Phyllis continues to campaign for change and to share the learning  from the missed opportunities identified in her daughter’s case.

She said: “Jessie died because of horrific domestic abuse. She had been with abusive partners her whole adult life.

“Alcohol was her coping mechanism. The police would be called, but he would make out like he was the victim because she was drunk. She started to believe she was wrong.

“The GP was told, as were other healthcare professionals. Not one agency wrote his name down. There was no professional curiosity or questions asked. No professionals shared their concerns or built a picture. One missed appointment and she was struck off people’s books – nobody considered maybe things had escalated and she couldn’t leave the house to make the appointment.

“All these were missed opportunities that would have saved my daughter. I trusted the professionals would have had the knowledge and carried out the checks and been more thorough – now I know that did not happen.”

Discovery

The family started to become concerned when Jessie’s appearance changed and she pulled away from them and her friends, only seeing them when her partner was present.

The full extent of what Jessie was experiencing came to light when Phyllis sat in on a police meeting where her daughter spent an hour recounting her trauma – evidence Phyllis said was never documented.

Professional curiosity 

Phyllis urged professionals at the SETDAB conference to be professionally curious and to put all the pieces of the jigsaw together by working collaboratively.

Phyllis said: “Nobody acknowledged the link between domestic abuse and suicide. Empathy and compassion were lacking for my daughter. The perpetrator abused her, but the professionals failed to protect her.

“I want professionals to learn that link between domestic abuse and suicide. It is a massive issue that does not get highlighted. The Government needs to realise they need to do something.

“I should have been able to grieve in peace.

“This is the first time I have given an in-person talk. I was up there thinking ‘you have to listen to me’. This has given me a boost.”

Reflections from Jane Gardner, Deputy Police, Fire and Crime Commissioner for Essex.

“Phyllis’ account quite rightly and quite appropriately made us all feel very uncomfortable. But, it is important that we hear this as professionals. There is nothing more powerful than hearing a lived experience to understand how we can better give the victim a voice.”

Further learning

You may be interested in SET Professional Curiosity e-Learning this course helps professionals understand the concept of professional curiosity and its importance when working with children, adults, and families, including in cases of domestic abuse.